Don't Hurt Me

It's interesting how all of us put up a brave front in such different ways.  When we are hurt, when we have hurt from the past or when we are simply afraid the future will bring hurt.  Some of us quietly take it all in and try to contain the chaos that tries to escape from within.  Some of us plaster on a smile and try to cover the pain with the loudness of laughter.  Some of us scream and shout demanding that others see us and fix all that is so wrong in the world.  We may become angry.  Angry at God.  Angry at others.  Angry at ourselves.  We may deny that we feel anything.  We may really believe that whatever is wrong in our families, in our lives, is separate from us.  That if we just keep it at a safe arm's length, it won't get to us.  If we maintain our bubble of safety the wares of the world will bounce off.

But, living in a bubble isn't really living at all.  Remember that episode from Seinfeld....the bubble boy episode?  It wasn't that there was something wrong with everyone else.  He was the one that had something wrong.  The bubble was for other people to be safe from his infectiousness.  The bubble did create a distance, and it created fear. 

The point is, our coping mechanisms, that we deem as helping us not to get hurt, may very well be hurting others by creating confusion and a wall.  I am the queen of justifying keeping that distance.  I have to fight that and continue to step outside of that bubble.  Yes, my imperfection may rub off on others and I may get hurt, but I am thankful for the Holy Spirit.  He is the cure for all of our diseases.  And he is the reason we can step out into the world every day despite our brokenness and sin.  He makes everything whole again.  Every relationship that has gone wrong, every misunderstanding, every wrong he can make right.